Actually had a really good day today but it just got ruined.
Do people not know about boundaries at all.
I'm so frustrated I don't know what to do.
Just want to go back to blocking out
but blocking out's more toxic.
UGH.
2 bad nights in a row.
Let it keep rolling.

Thank you so very much by the way, so much love for you x

xoxo,

Simaling

First week of 2016's almost over.
Actually got a shite load typed out but some reason I just keep them saved in my drafts.
Why, I have no idea.
Might be me and the whole "I don't have the right words."
But then again I know I'll probably never find the "right words" to describe anything.
Like how perfection doesn't exist.
One of my goals for this year tho,
is to actually start writing more, penning things down more,
so this shall be one of my three spaces.
'Cause it's not like I haven't got sufficient vocab and what not,
plus it'll be a really good way to keep my emotions in check,
which is something I actually need to start doing.

I guess that's all for now.
This space needs to be a bit more cheery.
I shall be working on that too ;)

Have a good 2016 anyway everyone <3

xoxo,

Simaling

2016, I'm ready for my next adventure ;)

Decisions.

I know I always say that I'll never let my heart make decisions ever again
'cause things always never turn out the way I want them to.
But I guess I gave into my heart again.
Do I regret it, yes I already do.
But well, life.

My throat's been a total pain in the arse
and I really hope it learn to be a bit nicer.
'Cause I can't deal w it right now.

G'night anyway.

xoxo,

Simaling

"Well, whatever makes you happy"

What if I say that you're the one that makes me happy.
But I guess it doesn't matter anymore. 
G'night you x 

xoxo,

Simaling

Would you.

5 years on but yes, I still miss you.
& I think about you so much more than I'll ever let myself admit.

I loved you more than life and I know you know that.
We were beautiful but we both know we were from the wrong walks of life.

Still remember how exactly we even started talking you sneaky one.

Hearing you cry, till today, is still one of the few things
that absolutely broke my heart.
We both knew why and it's nice to know that I managed to distract you from it for a tiny bit, that I made you smile.

You getting jealous and protective,
rushing down just so I don't go to someone else's house to chill while
waiting for your late ass (which is always worth the wait),

All the bets we made,
the ones I always pretended to lose count of so I can pretend that
I lost way more than I did,
just so I'd have more excuses to kiss you, wherever and whenever.

The way you said a movie reminded you of me,
the playground you brought me to where we spent most of our time at,
the way you'd lie just so I wouldn't worry but back up w an "I love you",
thank you for all of those wonderful memories.
They're priceless, and I wouldn't change a thing or do anything differently.


Thank you also for always helping me to see the brighter side of life,
viewing life from a whole new different perspective,
and thank you esp for bringing Mom & I closer together.
I cannot thank you enough for that.

We tried staying friends but I guess being friends just doesn't work for us,
but should we ever cross paths again, even as platonic friends,
I'll welcome you back into my life with wide arms :)

Hope you're doing good wherever you are.
Miss you <3

xoxo,

Simaling

For calling out loud.

Can't believe it's been more than 2 months since I last updated.
The past 2 months have been a journey.
Threats, accusations, last minute flights & moving house twice,
(not forgetting too many fights, tears and money involved)
I'm starting to question if anything will ever feel right.
Like calm down. All this needs to settle down.
Whatever it is tho, I'm just gna leave it be.
Not the best option but I need that breather.
But then again everything seems like it's going fine.
So what is up.

I've got a thought stuck in my head, it's been there for awhile now.
But I can't put it in words as of yet so I'll save that for when the right
way comes to mind.

I should go catch up on sleep debt now.
G'night.

xoxo,

Simaling